~*~The Ultimate Battle~*~

My name is Brittany or Butterfly to those on CC.  I have been stuggling with my weight for quite some time now.  I was always a little "thick" but over the years thick became just grossly fat.  I am 21 years old and have been a member of CC since July 18, 2008.  Not too long I know which means that I have a long way to go.  I started on this site weighing 211 lbs.  My goal weight is 140.  I have already lost 11 lbs with the help of this site so I am now at 200!  That is a major accomplishment for me since my weight has never went anywhere but up!

~*~My Life Past & Present~*~

The most important thing in my life right now is my son, Dominic.  He is 3 yrs old and the only true love of my life!  His daddy is no longer in the picture and that has been very hard for me to deal with.  Not only the financial part but the family part also.  I have a hard time "loving" somebody romantically.  It was never something I truely believed in until he came along.  The problem was that the feeling was OBVIOUSLY not mutual or he would still be here.  It has been quite a while since we have been apart but I am not even close to being over him or the pain that he caused me.  I think about the hurtful words he said to me every second of every day.  He called me fat on numerous occasions and now I am truly ashamed at what I have become.  Its amazing how hundreds of compliments from many different people can be overturned and ignored by just a few insults from the right person.  Now I am reclused.  I dont have any fun anymore and just stay inside only leaving to go to work.  People can see sadness in my eyes and they tell me everyday.  I want to change that.  I strive to be happy with myself once again and never again will I make the mistake of doubting myself.  I will succeed.

I am a ...  ... however ...  ... but I will always ...  ... that one day I can ...  ... to a place where I am ...  ... but right now ...