Health & Support

Welcome to BA. My name is Nicole and I'm a binger.

i decided that it could be helpful to have a forum for those of us trying to recover from this evil thing called binge eating disorder (BED). Whenever you have success... post here! Whenever you have struggles... post here! need support to stay out of the cookie jar?.... post here!

i'll be posting my intake of calories everyday in hopes that showing all of you what i eat will keep me from OVER EATING.

anyone with the same struggles??

Hey sunshine don't beat yourself up over it, it just makes it worse.  I know how hard it is to stay away from sweets, I have the biggest sweet tooth ever.  Don't tell yourself none at all because it will never last, try every other day, have a piece and find something else to do, read, exercise, laundry... leave the house if you have too!

  Thanks hollyjane... it's just hard to NOT beat myself up! I feel like i have to go a while without junk food so my mind and body knows that i can go WITHOUT it and still SURVIVE!! I do know that - but i dont.... you know what i mean?!

HI everyone, I just signed up on this site a couple days ago, so forgive me for not reading through all 62 pages of this post.

I have the same problems as many of you are having. I eat and eat and eat, even when it doesn't taste that good, or I don't even want it, I just eat because I started eating. I feel like if I eatmore than a certain amount (very very little) or eat a certain type of foor (usually carb-dense) that I may as well eat anything and everything because I have already ruined it for myself for the day.

All or nothing seems to be a common theme for most of us. 

When I was younger I had a bout of (what my psychotherapist called) bdd, or body dysmorphic disorder, where I thought myself to be much much larger than I actually was. I am 21, 5'6", and at the time I was going through this I was about 140.

Somehow I seemed to morph from bdd, to binge eating at about my freshman year in college (ironic as I got my bachelors in nutrition). I'm now 175 lbs and feel terrible about myself. 

I feel more out of control than ever right now. Even when I am being healthy and taking care of my body it seems like just a waiting game until the next binge. I will plan out binges that often last for days at a time. Followed by a day or two of starving, back into healthy eating, and it starts all over again.

 

I feel like it is bigger than me right now and I don't know what to do. I don't have the money to start going to therapy again, or I definitely would because it is winning right now.

Any help is greatly appreciated... 

Welcome to the thread, gennysaurus. You probably won't get much help here - I think we all feel as helpless as you ;-). Maybe writing about it helps you ... who knows?!

All or nothing? That's me. At the moment I've been going between less than 400 and more than 4000. At either extreme, food just isn't enjoyable ... which is sad, because I love food! I know that not eating enough makes binging worse and binging makes not eating enough worse ... but I just can't seem to get out of it.

For Lent I'm giving up sugar - something which almost always triggers a binge for me. That and sandwiches, anyway! Sooo ... fresh start and all.

Good luck Dreamer with giving up sugar and welcome gennysaurus.  It sounds like you are in the same boat I am in.  I work at a gym and am constantly giving people advice on eating and working out and the working out is not a problem because I love to do it but I have and awful problem controlling my binge eating.  I have realized that I can't eat like I used to because my metabolism is slowing down.  I used to be able to binge and not gain weight or get it off easier but now I am having problems getting off the weight and seem to keep eating.  I did great all week but I just binged.  I have eaten about 3300 cals and I believe I have burned about 2000, so now I am headed to the gym to try to burn the other 1300, wish me luck! haha

 I know not too many people have been on here in a while... BUT I NEED SOME HELP!!!

  I posted this in the Health forum and want your opinion as well

 

   So, i usually plan out my meals the day before and include all this healthy stuff. But usually a temptation or two comes a long. Sometimes i take it.... sometimes not. But the weekend is especially hard.

  Today, i did really well until 3 pm when my friend said she made dirt pudding - mmmm. So i went over and had some. I figured it was ok because i spent 2 hours in the gym this morning and had eaten well before then... i had some calories to spare!

   But since that dirt pudding i've eaten... mcdonald's for dinner (which i never eat at!), a little sized snickers and twix, and some more dirt pudding, about 15 m&ms, and rice pudding!! 

   My question is.... Why when i let myself indulge in 1 little treat... i feel like it doesn't matter if i eat like crap the rest of the day because i already messed up! Why can't i just be happy that i got a little treat and be done with it and eat healthy the rest of the day? It's like i crave bad foods for the rest of the day :(  

    This has been my vicious cycle the past few weeks and i've gained 5 pounds. And right now i just want to break down and cry and go to sleep and never get out of bed. AHHHHH - i'm SO MAD AT MYSELF!!

omg you sound so much like me!

last night at like 6:00 I was at 1950. I was like okay no more I can maintain on 2000. Then I made some fortune cookies and I started eating more and I was at 2650. I was like okay thats it then I went to my friends and her house is like junk food heaven. I started off with one piece of chocolate and that led to

10 piece of chocolate from germany
about 30 mini eggs if not more.
a piece of carrot cake
some broccoli salad
an egg roll
cream soda
and a bunch of chips

its like okay  you screwed up eat anything you want tonight because tomorrow you are starting fresh and being serious about it but I never ever do! I have gained 16 pounds from this and I really really want to get down to my goal before summer because If I dont its just not going to be as fun, Im going to be constantly thinking about how I shouldve just comitted to it earlier so I would feel comfterble in a bathing suit and just have a good time!

wow just saying that made me so motivated, butttt motivation seems to be over powered by my hunger most of the time!

I know when I have something sweet and then over eat for the rest of the day it's because I already feel like I messed it up so why not eat everything else that I want, but then I feel like crap.  Also don't use the thinking that I worked out I can be a little bad, try thinking that if I eat this I am going to have to be a the gym longer and work even harder!  I love working out but I don't want to be there all day so this can help me... sometimes.

For me what helps is getting out of the house.  I tend to over eat when I have the day off so I find things to do that will help.

I was home yesterday and overate by about 1000 calories so I had to go to the gym and work them off, I only burned about 700 though.

 I really can't take this anymore. I've gained 5 pounds in the past month! Why does my mom and friend have all this tempting food?? BUT... why can't i just say NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!!!! IT STOPS TOMORROW!

Day #1 BINGE FREE.... and NO desserts either

Today I joined CC and I decided my days of binging are officially over. As of tomorrow I am eating a maximum of 1500 cals- not all at once!!  Does it seem to anyone else that the binging was a result of recovery from an restrictive ED? Weird how our mind can take a complete 180.....In the end I've decided its all about control for me. I felt like I could control how much I didn't eat before and then I fell into feeling like I had the power to eat whatever I wnated and no one could stop me.  Lets just say I'm so over this distorted relationship w/ the neccessity to life. GOod luck bingers!

oatmealeater - i too suffer from BED... like you said - it's binging/restricting. Somedays i would probably eat 3,000 calories and then other days only eat 700! Well, after realizing that this is NOT helping me lose weight - i've decided to change.

I do think it's a battle. Not something you can change over night. One day at a time. And i WILL make it today! 

DAY #2... binge free!! YEAH!! I did have 2 cookies, but that was NOT a binge! If i were binging, i would eat a good 7-10!!! Although it wasn't a healthy choice, it's ok! Day #3 will be here tomorrow!

Congrats sunshine! Keep it up it will only get easier!  I am joining you starting now!

I binged yesterday, did really well until i got off work, had fast food and then went home and ate cookies, and today I already ate 2700 calories by noon!  So no more today and I need to workout and then I will be good tomorrow.

i didn't do so great yesterday. I was sooooooo hungry by the time i got home from work, that i had subway, then some chocolate and some cake :( I didn't necessarily "BINGE" but it wasn't good either. The next 2 weeks i'll be working 50 hours each week, so i figure i really wont have time to over indulge in sweets. Plus - i think it will be a good time to start up my SLIM Fast!

Hi my name is Sasha and I am finally admitting I have a binging problem

Before Christmas, I was underweight for my height. I decided i need to gain weight, so my original goal was 5 to 10 pounds. well, one thing led to another, and i started binging everyday. I cant stop myself now, and i have gained 20 pounds in a little less than two months.  I am disgusted and embaressed for myself. I need to stop this once and for all. I hope by finally admitting it, I will move on to a healthier, binge-free life. Tomorrow is binge free day number one, wish me luck!

I haven't been on here in a while . i thought i had gotten over this binging thing.  but im starting to realize that its become sugch a part of my life i dont even notice i do it until something major happens.

it's normal for me to eat half a bag of tortila chips.

or five spoonfuls of peanut butter out of the jar.

this is not healthy!  does anyone else have this problem?  I hadn't realized how bad it had gotten until a bought a jar of nutella this weknd and ate the whole jar in two days.  with a spoon straight out of the jar.  several years ago, the thought of this would have grossed me out.

has anyone else noticed that binging has become routine eating?  any suggestions for how to get it back in your head that this is NOT normal, not healthy?

i'm so ashamed of myself.  i tried to throw up yesterday but couldnt.  thank god.  but what if i ever do succeed.  it's scary. 

uh i binged today out of stress and worry and now i'm going to a convention for the weekend and i feel so gross right now and want to just make myself throw up. god i hate myself right now. this is so annoying.

in regards to my last post, basically i felt like a blimp all fri. night then i did pretty good on sat., but today since i've gotten home i've just eaten and eaten. it takes me a while to actually feel full, which really sucks b/c by the time i feel it, it's way past comfortable. ugh.