Motivation
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I have to agree--I don't beat myself up anymore if I have a high calorie day--and that's all it is for me just a high calorie day--so if I decide to have the pizza I have it and I don't feel bad--I just try to eat a little healthier at the next meal to balance it out----this is a lifestyle change for me not a diet......
and as far as father stories---I have none---I had lots of stepfathers in out of my life but no real "dad" ---worked out better for me anyways --probably would have been way too much drama---because now all I have is my mom and she is enough drama in herself!
Happy Easter to those who celebrate...I am not a Christian, but I had a less-than-positive food day anyway...go figure.
I just want to wish everyone who shared their stories about their parents a lot of peace and strength. I think that one of the rudest awakenings that you undergo as you enter independent adulthood is realizing that, like everyone else, your parents are fallible human beings...
On a positive note, I got accepted to my top-choice medical program! My acceptance letter was delayed in the post, and I thought it meant that I had been rejected...of course, that fed in to a very negative thought-cycle (powered by my father), that no one wants an overweight applicant to medical school...
On that note, I am curious to hear if any of you feel that you have been discriminated against in job environments, etc., due to your weight?
hilwe--congrats on the acceptance! I'm sure your thrilled--please do share the details if you would like---i would love to hear where you are going, what you are going to specialize in etc...
And as far as being discriminated against because of my weight---i'm not sure if I ever have but I have thought about it --not sure though
congrats hilwe! med school, wow! by the time you're done, you will be at your ideal weight and when you are doling out the advice to overweight patients, can truly relate to how difficult it can be to lose weight! i think it's great!
i'm really tired and not motivated to go to the gym right now but am going to do weights tonight. have 2 hours of dance tomorrow. i have not been sleeping well at ALL. just super stressed, tossed and turned the whole night, talked to the boy for 15-20 mins here or there throughout the night cuz he was on call and i couldn't sleep then would sleep for an hour or two and get up again. it was awful. have been having trouble sleeping for a few days now (wed-sat). not sure why it's THIS bad where as the other days it wasn't as bad when i first heard the news.... maybe cuz my mom was here? i don't know. the sleep problem started right after she left....
talked to my friend who used to be a trainer today and she said weights are the way to go. i have LOTS of excess skin now in my mid-section. it's really nasty and makes me feel ugly. i keep reminding myself that's a couple of pounds worth of skin that will be cut away that i don't need to worry about losing though :) and, on that note, i am going to go lift for a half hour.
that is so freakin' AWESOME hilwe!! i wanted to go to med school (psychiatry), but i only had 1 tiny problem. i kept failing my science and math classes. i have the greatest respect for anyone who can thrive in the medical field. congrats, and have a huge getting into to med school party!!!
dressing for your body shape
i've heard about this and recall hearing some of this talk on "what not to wear" but was just wondering if anyone had some tips. as i start to lose more (2 more lbs down since last week!) and have the hanging skin issues, i'm wondering what sorts of clothes will best conceal or flatter my mid-section? i'm thinking long straight skirts past the knee would look cute. how else do i draw attention away from my mid-section? i tend to lose on the top first even though the mid-section is the most problematic!
just to add to this. i did the my virtual model thing. am kind of skeptical now. did the whole bottom heavy selection. i don't look anything like the 235 lbs woman (just plugged in the bottom heavy, my height, and that weight) so it's hard to believe i'm supposed to look like that in 30 more lbs. and the 200 lbs model (my new display pic) also seems quite far-fetched but who knows.
so yeah, looked at "myself" on there at 235, 215, 200, 190, 175, 150. i don't see much of a difference from 200 on down until i get to about 150. the differences in the weights are supposedly a size or two and yet a size 14-16 (200 lbs) looks pretty damn good just like a size 10 does.
I'm absolutely back on track, now! I went to an Easter brunch yesterday and probably ate a little too much, but I was so good for the rest of the day, I hit my calories dead on. Also I worked out on Saturday (which is huge for me since I always plan to and then never do), and I restarted the couch to 5K (cuz I never made it past Day 1 last time), and hopefully I can finish the whol first week this time! Yay! I'm in a killer mood because of it too... I'd forgotten how much better I feel when I'm working out.
Welcome to everyone new! I'm glad you found us! :-)
Mladdy, WAY TO GO on being under 200! I'm hoping I continue to be at a twin weight with you when I weigh myself tomorrow. *fingers crossed* We'll see! The last time I was 200lbs was in college, in 2003. I'd been on an all liquid diet that summer (instigated by my mother... more on that in a bit), and when I got back to school I gained back the 20lbs I'd lost and then some. I'd always told myself that if I ever hit 200lbs, I'd give up everything bad for me until I was back down, but it didn't happen. I remember the day I got on the scale and it said 202lbs when the last time I'd checked I was like 190. I went out drinking that night, lol!
As far as mom issues go, I've also given my mother the silent treatment before. It was for 3 months because she went off on me when I called to borrow money to fix my car (it was my first year out of college and I wasn't so good at money management). The thing is that we've always had a tense relationship, and she didn't just go off at me for being bad with money, but she yelled at me about everything she's ever thought was wrong with me. It was pretty bad. I hung up on her and didn't talk to her again until my dad tricked us into going on vacation together and we HAD to talk. Now things are better between us, but I still don't really confide in her. We're just too different. I've always been a daddy's girl (he actually calls me his mini-me 'cuz we're so much alike! lol!), and we get along way better than my mom and I do. My mom was always on me about my weight growing up (while feeding my brother anything he wanted to fatten him up since he was so skinny). I got very good at sneaking food as a kid (although I never had to hide in the bathroom, yessicazctcs... I mostly hid food around the house to retrieve later since my mom could hear the pantry open in her sleep. Occasionally when my mom was cleaning she'd find cookies behind picture frames and inside vases where I'd forgotten them!) :-)
pinkcobra, my boobs have started to sag :-( I've lost most of my weight in my upper body, and I think a big chunk was from them, although my cup size has stayed the same. I've also heard that weight training helps, but if you find any magic cure, please share! I'm starting to get a little tummy sag too, so any help would be totally appreciated!
watchme, I made one of those weight avatar things, and basically it seems like I'll look the same from 220lbs all the way down to 160lbs when I'll shrink a little bit, and then at 140lbs I'll suddenly be thin. Riiiiight. I'm a little skeptical too, although I keep it around for the motivation. You know, it's funny because I feel smaller and thinner, but every so often I'll catch a glimpse of myself in a window or something (I don't own a full length mirror because they depress me), and I'll realize I'm still huge, and that when I'm walking down the street feeling all cute, people don't see a girl losing weight, they still see a fat girl. So maybe the virtual model isn't so wrong after all... *shrugs*
Original Post by hilwe85:
On that note, I am curious to hear if any of you feel that you have been discriminated against in job environments, etc., due to your weight?
Hi Hilwe,
I work in the legal industry and there is a lot of discrimination about how much you weigh and what you look like in this field. It's actually very sad because sometimes you know that you would be perfect for a job but they won't even look at you because you are carrying an extra 60 lbs.
My ultimate goal, career wise, is becoming a Justice of the Peace, the hardest part becoming one is you have to be appointed and you have to get your name out there. So as you can guess you are judged by what you look like and how you present yourself and unfortunately if you are over weight it's doesn't look good on you, especially if you are a female. <-- One of the many reasons why I am trying to lose weight.
watchme, those virtual models are crap. they don't really represent a real woman once you're past 200 lbs.
as for dressing for your shape, i think the best jackets for you would be ones that have structure and already have an hourglass shape built into them. get ones that are single-breasted, deep v-neck, and stop at the top of your hip or shorter. personally, i like cropped jackets, but we don't have the same body shape, and i don't work in the corporate world.
skirts: at the knee or just below it. and go for skirts with a tiny bit of flare at the knee, think tulip skirts. and pants? straight leg or straight wide leg. and heels! heels always make you look taller, ergo thinner. but no round toe heels; they'll make your legs look stumpy. hope this helps!
edit: i once saw another woman shaped like you in this killer suit. she had the kind of jacket i described, but she paired it with a gorgeous black pencil skirt. i forget if you like the way your legs look, but if you do, that'd be crazy flattering.
grr. Just my rant. ^_^
and I hope you all have a wonderful, productive, fulfilling week.
Hey everybody! Well, I over did it in the sun yesterday. I went to Disneyland for the day (got there at 8 am and left at 6:30 pm) and wore no sunscreen what-so-ever! I brought a pack lunch, so I ate really well at the park. I couldn't resist a pineapple sorbet float, but I shared most of the sorbet with my son and drank mostly pineapple juice. I did stop and get some sweets at Pooh's candy store, but I only ate a very little bit on the drive home. The bad part was that we stopped at Denny's on the way back. Since it was 9 pm by the time we ate, I was ravenous and binged on a hugle ultimate omelette, hasbrowns, and a buttermilk biscuit. Then today, I finished the huge dark chocolate peppermint patty, a small chocolate turtle, half a "honey pot" apple (carmel & choclate dipped), along with a large handful of Lay's chips, and a glass of Mountain Dew. I know I shouldn't have eaten all of that garbage, but it tasted gooooood, and I refuse to beat myself up over it! I think I'll take a nap and then get on the treadmill (Couch to 5k) and maybe the elliptical afterwards.
Welcome to everyone that's new!
My relationship with my dad is pretty good. I don't share with him like I do with my mom, but we get along well. He and I play a lot of cribbage when I'm back home for a visit :) My dad is part of a union and has done a lot of work out of town since I was about 12 or so, so if there was anything I could have changed about my relationship with him, it'd would have been that he would have had the opportunity to spend more time at home with us. After he developed type 2 diabetes his demeanor changed a bit too. He became more short tempered (resulted in cussing mostly), so maybe more patience would have been nice too. There was a time in junior high that I refused to talk to him for well over a month (He "did away" with my cat, because he thought it was eating the newborn kittens next door at my grandpa's farm. It turned out to be the mother cat and not my sweet Tom afterall.). Another time, when my mom was out of town, I gave him lip about not wanting to do the dishes (AGAIN), and he slapped my butt and called me a b****, so I called my grandma and stayed a couple nights with her. He cried when I left and apologized when I came back. I feel bad about it now... He's never said anything negative about my weight, and is usually the first to comment that I look good in an outfit. I love my dad!
About body shapers... I have some shorts that are knee length and stretch up to under my boobs. I think they're pretty comfortable, and I absolutely cannot wear a skirt or a dress without them (thighs rub). I had a corset for my wedding that helped me look pretty for that occasion, but I ended up with bruises where the wiring dug into my sides. I wore it under a dress when I went to Vegas and it did the same thing, so I have put it away and don't plan on trying it again (well maybe when I get down to 175 I'll try it on). I've tried on spanx at the store, but they make my lower pooch stretch up and add to my mid-belly, making me look pregnant. I'd rather have a defined waist with some issues below it than make it one huge, continuous, big belly, but that's just my opinion.
About my virtual model... I really like mine, but mostly because it resembles me so closely it's almost freaky! I wish with all my might that I will look like the smaller version when I am at the corresponding weight!
About dressing for my shape... I didn't pay too much attention to this prior to watching shows like "What Not to Wear." Now I know better than to wear skirts/dresses that are floor length, shirts that go past my hips, and horizontal stripes. I dress more for my shape now than I ever have before, but I still don't always look good. I wish I had the funds to buy the beautifully tailored clothes like they show on "WNTW;" that might help.
The rest of my responses probably will be out of order, but I think that's ok. :)
allydan- Thanks for cheering me on, and I know that you have it in you to get into the 1's with no turning back! Good luck on the Couch to 5k program, too!
hiwe85- I think it's highly possible that I could have been passed up for jobs because of my size, but I don't have huge inclinations that this is the case.
Boots- I just want to lift you up today and tell you that YOU ARE LOVED! You've travelled some long hard roads in your life, but hopefully the one that you're on now has beautiful sunshine and scenery, and clear and smooth paths.
katydid22- It's great to bump into someone who has gone through the tough stuff to end up so close to their goal weight! Thanks for reminding us that it can be accomplished! Like Suzanne said, feel free to stay and chat!
Welcome, fantasyflight! I have a deep affection for sweets too. If there's one thing that messes up my healthy eating for the day, it's the goodies. Just remember that it's not worth eating them if you're only going to make yourself feel bad about it afterwards. Either enjoy it during and after, or pass! You deserve an award for your self-control with the Easter sweets! Way to go!!
dalmalama- That's a great attitude to have when dealing with your mom. Sometimes we just have to grin and bear it, be quick to forgive, and move on from there. There's no positive that can come from holding grudges; they only make you feel bad about yourself in the long run!
hiwe85 & alibuch- I second you on learning bad eating habits from parents. I eat like there's no tomorrow when I'm with them. :) But I feel good about it! I know I'll get back on track and won't be any worse for the wear.
watchme- It sounds like you did pretty good with your choices yesterday afterall. I would call that an average day. Eating even at maintenance once or twice a week is very good for your metabolism.
yessica- Thanks for the praises; it feels good to share successes with friends! I'm looking forward to your annoucement soon! Hmm... a mother/daughter tummy tuck... might get a deal out of the surgeon, but I don't think it's going to be necissary. :) I really want to just do it sensibly though and avoid the unnecissaries.
ksatama- That's great that your mom joined Curves! Make sure you praise her and tell her how proud you are of her for that. Any chance you might want to join and be her exercise buddy? Don't beat yourself up about food. It's ok to eat that way every once in a while!
pinkcobra- Yummy, crab omelette sounds DELICIOUS! I'm going to eat sensibly the rest of the day too (after my splurge before 11 am!).
don't beat yourself up! doing that will only help to perpetuate a cycle of negative thinking and self-disgust. who wants that? Right on, dalmalama!!!
Where do you get one of these virtual models?
mvm.com
ooo hope everyone is having a great day! It looks like the sun is out today (which is rare in seattle) so I might go outside today! Girls, I'm so lazy , it's 1pm and I just officially woke up---I told myself I wouldn't do this but this is my last Spring Break before I graduate and have to get a real job so I'm taking full advantage of it--I will never have another break like this again! I'm fixing to go out and exercise ---Hope everyone is having a great day!
Relish every second of it, Boots!
Good Evening ladies! Hope everyone had a happy Monday! Mine wasn't too bad. I'm still trying to push over that plateau. I meet with my trainer again tomorrow.
When I got to my biggest (287), I was larger than my mom. It scared me. I never wanted to be larger than my mom. Then I started losing and she talks about trying to lose weight (although she eats HORRIBLY...greasy breakfast sandwiches everyday, etc.). She just wants to be smaller than me. I am about to surpass her. It sounds so bad, but I just want to be smaller than her. I will feel accomplished.
Have a good week ladies! Let's kick butt.
danibelle, i understand, believe me! when i first started trying to lose weight, my first goal was just to be able to fit my mother's clothes. she wore a 22/24, and at 320 lbs, i could only wish to fit in a 24. soon, i could fit her clothes and she could no longer tell me her clothes were too small for me. then, her clothes got too big for me! that day was awesome. my mom is shorter than me, so even though i'm a couple sizes smaller than her now, i still weigh a few pounds more than her. i can't wait till i weigh less than her, it's gonna be a great day.
ahola ladies. been having a great spring break. now is time to get back on track. i gained 4lbs on my spring break diet, alcohol and beer only. hehe oh well. gotta get back to school and getting things in order. med school is a major WOW!!! i have failed my remedial algebra class i dont how many times. very frustrating but congrats for you. i dont even need math. i am going to work in a plant.
Hi everyone, I am new here. Just started today and am hoping this will give me the extra push I need to do well. I am a 25 year old stay at home mom. I am starting at 5'4" and at 208 pounds and need to lose about 80 pounds, to reach my goal weight. I need to find the strength inside of me to be able to accomplish my weight loss goals. Not only for me, but for my daughter and my husband as well. I would love any positive comments, advice, or weight loss ideas! Please feel free to check out my first journal entry, and add as a friend. (Like I said I am new to all of this and not sure how it all works yet.) I look forward to hearing great things from all of you! Good luck on your adventure as well!
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