Motivation

Hi everyone.

I'm a very healthy eater from day to day. VERY healthy. And I'm quite proud of my diet and my will power. I eat whole grains, lean meats, fruits and vegetables and low fat dairy products. I also eat portions of nuts and drink lots of water.

But I have a problem. I'm in university, and tend to go out to the bars on the weekends every now and then. Now, I can deal with a night of drinking, because I can control how much I drink and I dont drink really hefty sugary drinks. My problem is my loss of will power to junk food when I drink. I eat so much... SO MUCH chocolate when I'm drunk! So much that sometimes I feel ill the next day, but of course, I get back on track and dont drop my calories the next day because I know it's unhealthy recoil.

After this rant, I propose creating this group to support and track / log how many days myself and any others interested in joining can go binge free. I still dont mind having small portions of chocolate throughout the day because they might be just 5g portions. I just want to be able to motivate myself to stay on track and not destroy my healthy diet every weekend.

So, I'm going to start out. Since I went all out last night, today is...

Days without bingeing: 1 (I know the whole day hasnt gone by, but I know I'll control it today haha)

Thanks! 

Hey everyone, I hope youre all having a great weekend!

Im sorry I havent been able to check back, again, school is really building up and there is so much work to do, I have an essay due wednesday and an exam tuesday night, and then finals start soon. Hopefully I will get a chance to read through the posts soon!

Sharonclaire im still on for up to the end of april (and hopefully further! I hope were not "planning" on giving up by then!)

Its not 5 days without bingeing, and today will be day 6!

On another note, I have developped Achilles Tendonitis from my running and triathlon training. It got so bad up till thursday (the tendon was "creaking"), but I have recieved a persciption anti-inflammatory, heel inserts, have been stretching and icing it. So I havent worked out since this past tuesday.... its so hard not to be working out. It has improved lightyears within the past 2 days, but I dont think im going to push it, because if I hurt it any more, theres a good chance I wont be able to train for a long time. Will keep updated.

Have a great day everyone!

I screwed up yesterday, so I'm back to day one. And I'm really depressed because I weighed 122 on the doctors scale on Friday(day after binges), but 2 days before that I was 116. :(. I know it doesn't seem like a lot, and it's probably all physiological. I just can't get back on track. It's like I'm sitting in a pool of self pity. And I can't lift weights or do anything srenuous with my hand, so that's out of the picture. And I can't go swimming for a while either. It's just too hot to go jogging. I guess I just have to get through these first couple of days, and hopefully it will get better. well good luck everyone! 

kae! don't even think about your weight! it will come down. And stop beating yourself up...you've been doing very well! pull yourself together as best you can now, even before you head home. remember, if you are really depressed by your behavior, you are just feeding the monster. lol You are a reader, kae, maybe it's time to pick up Jean Antonello's books (the ones risabelle recommended!).

alexw, sorry to hear @ your injury! I started running again last week and have decided to put it off because I have a recurring heal problem! it IS a drag. but, stay focused on your goals...this is just an obstacle. this is how we all grow! April and beyond...alright, then! I'm in. kikbox has joined us, too...kikbox, are you in?

everyone else, be well!  

OHH MAN... Okay, so I'm sitting here trying to write an assignment due tomorrow and it's not working. All I can think about is a binge. I mean, I'm not hungry AT ALL because I just ate dinner a couple hours ago, but I'm craving stuff like crazy. Stuff that I haven't tasted in a really long time it seems.

I'm finding myself day dreaming and planning out a MASSIVE BINGE. Not just a little, I mean like, going in to Pizza Pizza and ordering up a couple pizzas just for myself. Then heading over to the grocery store to get some chips, philly garlic dip, ice cream, browines and cakes, peanut butter, oeros, cookies, Hershey kisses, bars of chocolate... ALL OF MY FAVORITE FOODS.

Hahah, I can actually see myself go through the store and pick out all these things and then go to the cashier and see the expression on her face while she looks at the pile of junkfood. Then I can see myself bringing all of it home, and just rotating from pizza, to chips, to cookies, to pizza, to chocolate, to ice cream, and over and over and over and over...

WOW.

AM I INSANE, OR WHAT? LOL

I've actually thought the entire process out in my head and almost feel like I actually did it. WEIRD.

LUCKILY, I have nothing of that kind of stuff here in my apartment to actually binge on, except healthy stuff and I'd rather not waste a binge on healthy stuff right now. I would rather go all out.

But, I have no access to the grocery store right now or the pizza place, so I really can't go through with it if I tried. I still have my nighttime snack of an apple and PB to complete my calorie count for the day. I just wanted to share with all of you my CRAZY day dreaming experience of an extreme binge (which would probably make me puke at some point). Thank goodness it didn't happen in real life.

So today is the end of day 1. I'm not going to eat anything else since it is 9pm, and I've reached my daily goal of 1600. Today I danced for 35 minutes and did 2 ab workouts which gives me a deficit of about 500ish, I think. I'm just hoping to stay on track for at least the next couple weeks. Good luck everyone!

Well done Kae! :)

2 days binge free so far. Saturday night was pretty messy because I went out, had to get the first train home the next morning from London and was stuck at King's Cross for 45 minutes on my own. So I went and got a chicken burger and chips, and two chocolate bars to keep me company.

Oh well. I managed to fit them into my daily allowance, and ate super healthy for the rest of the day to make up for it. I'm starting to get used to my normal routine again so hopefully my behaviour will go back to a more normal state now. And I managed to stave off a possible pasta binge last night. Feeling positive today woopwoop.

cool, rampant!

well, alexw and kikbox, I had an unusual day yesterday. I was out all day w/my teenage son. I packed lunches for us and had a mini breakfast before we left the house. By p.m. I had more work to do and had a donut out.

The thing is that my day wasn't centered around food. Until the donut, I chose carefully and well. But, even with the donut, I didn't really enjoy eating it and certainly didn't want another. THERE WAS NO THRILL IN EATING IT. I think I used to get some satisfaction from this kind of thing...like a cheating feeling! You know, like an alcoholic hides his bottles...I would sneak bites of junk food! I kinda feel like the wicked witch of the west...I'm melting, melting!!! I just don't know me anymore. Plus, all of this yesterday behavior happened w/o even thinking. There was food all around us when we were out. Crappy, available food plus my sister offered to buy us pizza! We turned it all down until the little donut. And, I think the truth was that it seemed so deceptively small. It wasn't until later that I remembered how loaded w/crap and cals they are. So, I didn't even agree to it as an indulgence.

Alright, this is such new thinking to me that I think I need a star for yesterday. I think we need a new category for days like this kikbox and alexw...days when we may go over calorie (I'm pretty sure I must have) but we give ourselves credit for attitude. Cause yesterday really did earn me a star!!!

weird to be not wrapped up @ my consumption when there was food everywhere.

everyone have a great day!

I vote NOT insane, elise!

way to go, kae!

UGH!  This weekend was simply AWFUL   I have no clue what happened...but I ate a whopping 8000 calories on Saturday!  I feel SO icky...

don't feel icky, liora! as soon as it starts it gets out of control quickly...we all know that. it really helped me to find as many support systems out there as possible...therapy and sympathetic friends...friends in the most unexpected places AND to start getting busy w/things I enjoy doing...things that make me feel good about myself. remember, this is all about changing behavior and that is it!!! When you put an 'icky' to it, you give it some subjective value, then it becomes equal to you and sometimes greater than you and it controls you.

But, you are reversing this equation...you in control.  

You ARE getting control of it liora! I know it because I went through the same seesaw you are going through. But, start looking at your problem areas more closely. Why the weekend? loneliness? work? relationships? what is the trigger?

take care...it may not feel that way today but you ARE working this through!

thanks for all your support Sharon. It's helped a lot.

And Liora, I feel you. I don't even want to think about how many calories I ate with my bestfriend, so I'm simply not going to. I didn't add up how much I ate, and now I'm just focusing on getting back on track. You can do it. We all slip up sometimes.

Today I went jogging! yay, first time in about a week. But it was so hot. Sometimes I just hate living in Florida, well actually most of the time I hate living in Florida. It's just too hot sometimes, and you only get a break like for 2 months out of the year. Okay, enough of my complaining. 

I've done good so far today, and it's almost 9 so I've reached my calorie goal for the day. If I get hungry later, I'm thinking about making some peppermint tea. Well, good luck to you all.

Days without binging: 2

kae, i hate florida weather, too! :  ) glad you're feeling good!

Liora, don't worry too much, it won;t undo all of the good work that you've done so far.  Start counting again.

Why this weekend?  What happened?

 

Well done sharon! Don't worry about it Liora, or get too worked up about it or it might affect your mood and you might think, "**** it" and binge again. Just chalk it up to a bad day and let go of it...

I didn't binge yesterday, but I did manage to eat a whole 250g bag of yoghurt coated ginger by eating small pieces throughout the day, which I left 400 calories spare for just in case. Incidentally, does anyone know the calorie content of yoghurt coated ginger? The type that comes in chunks from health food stores. I have a feeling it's gonna be v high in calories, which is depressing because it's so yummy...

I've also started wearing a piece of ribbon that's as long as my waist around my right arm. It's a nice little reminder when I feel the urge to binge, go to open the fridge door and see the efforts of my hard work wrapped around my wrist.

Days without bingeing: 3

I have read a couple books by Jean Antonello that have really opened my eyes.  She is an eating disorder specialist, and former binger herself.  She said the number-one symptom of bingeing is undereating--eating significantly less food than you need.  Bingers are just as afraid of being fat as anorectics, but are less successful at avoiding food.  Jean says any diet under 2100 calories a day signals potential starvation to the body, and from Jean's experience, that includes every single diet she's ever heard about.  So when you diet, your metabolism drops, then the powerful urge to overeat and binge are the adaptions to undereating.  Significant overeating and the urge to overeat occur only in people who are or have been undereating (dieting).  Dieters tend to crave sweet and/or fatty foods because the body of a dieter (undereater) is influenced by the physiological need to store fat, because the body's top survival priority in a famine environment is fat storage.  So your cravings for fat producers mean you're not eating enough good food when you need it.  This is your SURVIVAL INSTINCT. (Do not be led into believing you are bingeing for emotional reasons or any other excuse you can dream up--your body came equipped with a survival mechanism, and this only proves that it is working.)  Jean says if undereating is the environmental stress that provoked adaptive weight gain, the logical way to eliminate this need for extra fat, and the body's adaptive responses that produce it, is to eliminate undereating.  This means stop going hungry, and start learning to eat.  This is very difficult for people with eating fears, but Jean says getting and staying thin must be done in harmony with our survival instincts if we want to be thin and enjoy normal eating habits too.  In Jean's own experience, plus 12 years of research, and counseling hundreds of others, she is convinced the human body is designed to maintain a lean adapted body weight when it gets enough good food on demand.  I was a binger, but since reading her books and learning how to eat according to body signals, I have not binged in over two months and am eating when hungry and stopping when full.  How wonderful and freeing. This is how eating was meant to be enjoyed.  Jean is now naturally thin and has been so for many years, and eats when hungry and stops when full.  She has nailed every single thing I've ever felt about food in her books and since the propaganda in the diet industry is "eat less, exercise more, " is it any wonder we are getting fatter as a nation?  Think about it, why isn't the "eat less, exercise more" theory working?  Why aren't we all thin?  Why can't we do it?  The dieting industry has us hooked.  The industry is making billions while we are getting fatter.  In Jean's experience, every single eating disturbance that she has ever encountered in more than 500 clients started with DIETING.  She has also observed that most typical dieters suffer from at least some symptoms of bulimia.  So do you really want to continue down this dieting path?  I was a dieter too and bought into all of those dieting myths for years, until I realized something was just not right.  Why are so many of us not achieving the weight loss results that the dieting industry says we can, just by eating less and exercising more?  I consider it a miracle that I found out the truth, and hope all of you will research this a little further.  I do not know Jean personally, but found her books on Amazon ( I got the CHEAPEST, USED books I could find) and they turned my life around.  I know the truth now, and am no longer at war with my body, and am on my way to being naturally thin.

Hi Everyone, I had a busy weekend so I couldn't check in and I've got a nasty cold that I picked up yesterday.  Sharon and Alexw, I messed up I'm afraid, I had minim binge on Friday which I wasn't counting because I was still within maintenance calories and I did well on Saturday and Sunday, was at maintenance both days also.  However, yesterday I blew it.  I started feeling sick in the evening and that brought on the comfort food cravings and before I knew it, I had chalked up 4000 cals for the day.  Not happy about that.  Not super upset either.  With the amount of exercise I do, it'll be a maintenance week so no gain to worry about but it still stinks.  So I've messed up the beginning of April anyway.  I'm still in if I'm allowed, there's still 21 days in April and then my birthday at the beginning of may so I'll make that my goal.  You two are doing really well!  I just have to follow your example. 

Hi,

I am trying so hard not to binge right now. I'm actually at work and super-stressed, and I came here to try and get some perspective! I am having just one of those days and it's definitely a struggle.

Tonight I'm going to the gym and I am more than looking forward to my yoga class! I've only done one class before and it was absolutely amazing. It was hot yoga and I can actually feel myself calm down just remembering some of the class. I really need this today, and I'm hoping that it will stave off emotional eating.

Wish me luck (and a little self-control!)

Blargh... I just blew it, yet again. It's the curse of the the Tuesdays or something, I swear. Tuesday is my day off from working out and I guess this throws me off or something, and I always binge. Last Tuesday I binged, but the next six days were fantastic. I wanted to try soooo hard to make it through today. I almost did.

I can find two reasons why I binged today:

1.) I trained myself really well to eat breakfast and I always eat breakfast right when I get up. I fell asleep today, and as soon as I woke up, my body/mind was telling me I wanted to eat. I always get this feeling right after a nap.

2.) Emotional Eating. When I was napping, I had one of those horrible dreams where my dad was in trouble/possibly dead and I was jerked out of my sleep right after that and felt very very sad. There was a tear running down my cheek.

I guess these are logical reasons why I binged. I got up and had two cups of Kashi Fiber cereal, a whole bunch of these sugary, gummy candies (130 cals for 5 pieces, I probably had like 15 - 20), 2 tablespoons of peanut butter (95 cals/tbsp), a lindtt chocolate (80 cals for just ONE!), one Hersey kiss (25 cals for 1) and THREE Fiber One bars (140 cals/each). I think that's all.

I had breakfast and lunch today, and with my binge my daily calorie count comes to a grand total of 2200 calories. I'm scared I over did it on the fiber. I hope I don't get stomach problems tonight/tomorrow. I'm kind of hoping it keeps me full and not hungry for the rest of the night so I don't eat anything else today. It's almost 6pm and I'm still completely STUFFED.

Anyway, today was a sedentary day so I burn about 1850 calories on these days. I'm going to the library though and I have to walk so maybe this will help me burn at least an extra 100 - 200 calories. That would be great. Then I could count this binge more as an over-eating day since it could have been worse. It definitely felt like a binge to me, though.

I want to kill this "Curse of the Tuesday Binge." Next Tuesday... I HAVE TO DO IT. Tomorrow is a new day. Here I go, to the library, to walk off some of these calories.

Good luck everyone!!

Good job Rampantbunnylove on day 3!

How are you doing Sharon?

Great job on not beating yourself up Kikboxgirl. You're showing improvement just with that.

I wish you luck Crystar!

Oh, and Elise_m, don't stress about couple a couple hundred calories over your maintenance. Tomorrow is a new day.

Anyways, my day was pretty good. Danced for 35 minutes and did 2 ab workouts. I can't wait till I can go swimming and lift weights again though. Hopefully it will be soon. Oh, and I forgot to tell everyone that I got back home last Friday, so I don't have to deal with all the family eating and stuff. Well good luck everyone!

Days w/o binging: 3

Well I did it again.

I went out tonight and saw I guy that I had a messy love situation with that was never properly sorted out. So I got bummed out and made a massive bowl of pasta for myself with two Quorn burgers and cheese as soon as I got home, which I then ate and purged.

I'm so sick of myself and my disgusting eating habits right now.