Young Calorie Counters

Sorry in advance for the babblings.

I feel trapped. I used to be 125ish lbs at 5'8'', but now i'm 140 or higher. I'm 14 years old. I've never ever been happy with myself, but now I feel like I'm at rock bottom. If i was unhappy with myself at 125, I'm absolutely miserable now. I keep making plans to lose 15 lbs (that was when i was 125) and now I feel like I'm going to be fat for the rest of my life. I feel horrible all the time and I cry all the time and I cant get my weight off my mind. I think about it all the time. Now i just wish i was 125 again- but now i'm 140, and I hate myself so much for being this fat. Sometimes I try to starve myself, my anorexic tendencies kicking back in, but then I just over-eat. I try to eat a healthy amount, but it never works either. I just hate myself so much. I wish I was a normal skinny kid that didnt care about what they weighed or looked like and just ate when they felt like it but I'm not.

I'm fat and I'm ugly and I just want to be pretty and I know that's shallow and petty and vain and that there are important things going on in the world, but I just can't think about anything else. I'm usually a straight A student, but I havent been focusing lately because i cant stop thinking about how UGLY I am.

I used to actually LOVE my legs. They were skinny and strong and I liked them. Now my thighs are even bigger and i have stretch marks ALL OVER THEM. I didnt think I looked that much different from the 15 lbs weight gain, but I guess I have. I can't button all of my jeans anymore. I used to be a size 2 or 3...but now i'm a 5 or 6 or bigger.

I need help. I can't take this anymore. I'm sick of being fat and ugly and I just want to be 125 pounds again. I want to be perfect and small and tiny and look like I'm about to break, and I know thats unhealthy, but I cant help it.

I'm just so sick of who I am. And I hate myself for caring this much about how I look because I'm not THAT person that only cares if her hair is right and her makeup is perfect- i like to think i have some SUBSTANCE, but I'm starting to doubt if I do.

I'm losing my friends because I'm being anti-social, because I'm embarassed to be in public. I never go outside because I'm scared my neighbors will judge me and see how fat I've gotten. I hate meeting new people because I'm fat and I put things off until I'm skinny. I have dreams about how I'll be perfect when I lose 10 or 15 or 20 pounds.

I'm so so so sorry for the rambling post, again. But I feel like I'm drowning or something and I need air.

I have problems :(

Hi Keira,  not sure I can add much more than other posters, but I would like to try to encourage you to do one thing above all else, which is to try to think positive.  When you think positive, you are much more likely to do the right things for your body, and see the healthiest ways to do what you want.

Just remember that 1200 is the minimum amount of calories for any female to eat in any one day, be sure to keep that as a golden rule to follow.

Try to focus on keeping active, and also try to move your focus away from your weight and channel it to other interests and pursue your other interests with the same intensity that you are putting into your worry over your weight.

I don't pretend to understand the way you are thinking, but I do know that I myself can get obsessed over things, and my focus can be quite intense for some time, often to the detriment of other things.  But I have noticed myself that if I consciously focus, I can switch my obsession from one thing to another.

Another thing you might try is to look to some female celebrity that you admire that is around your height (NOT a fashion model), and see if you can find out her weight and stats on the web somewhere.  You may be surprised to learn that their weight is not a lot different to even your current weight. 

Let me give you one example, Angelina Jolie is 5'8" too.  There was word in the press about a year ago that people were worried she was getting too thin and losing her great body (following the loss of her mother), she was down at around 110lbs and her friends and family were very worried.  She was around 125lbs when she did Tomb Raider.  There would be little dispute that her body was super hot at that time!

One thing you mentioned was about your tummy, you are not happy with it.  Well, this is one thing that may help, or you may not be happy to hear, but, some girls will not be easily able to "flatten" their tummy until they have fully developed.  Keep that in mind, and don't stress too much.  You are young, and your current weight is fine.  Have courage, believe in yourself, and be positive!

 

Ok I know some ppl are coming down on you but If you ever need to talk you can message me. I feel the same way im 5'5 148 I used to be 120 well b4 I had kids. But Ideally I would like to be back there.

my biggest problem is my stomach. its really flabby and not toned at all, and if i could just lose weight there i would be really happy. thats really all i want :(

How many crunches a day are you doing?  How far do you run each day?  Do you use several different isolation crunches, or just standard crunches?   Do you work your obliques as hard as your upper and lower abdominal muscles?  Are you eating at least 1800-2000 calories a day?  Are you achieving a 800-1000 calorie deficit through exercise expenditures?  how much cardio vs. resistance training are you doing each week?  If you are not doing all of these things, then you don't really want a tight tummy, or to be fit, you are just being lazy and whining about something you are not willing to work for.  Sorry for being blunt, but thats what it takes.

 "Nothing worth having comes without some kind of fight... You have to kick at the darkness 'till it bleeds daylight!" - B. Cockburn

These are very sad and unfortunate views of your body :(

Psychologist seems absolutely necessary.

 

 

>hug< sorry, just seems like you need one.

thanks for everybody's responses...i really appreciate it

i havent really counted calories today...thats sort of good, i guess, but i feel like a fat pig. i hate it because whenever i dont eat or havent eaten much i feel so empty, and i love it- and i know thats sick :(

i havent weighed myself for 1 1/2 months either...mainly because i'm scared

hi, i'm not sure if you are still worrying about it but if it is any consolidation...

in the summer i began reducing the amount i ate and exercised like a mad woman because i wanted a tight stomach, and i got anorexia because of it. i am a swimmer, so we did tons of abs and workouts and hypothetically, i would have had the best abs ever. but thats not how women are built physiologically. we have a little more flab in the stomach area because we are made to be able to have babies. no matter how thin or toned you get, your stomach will still be a little flabby. those pictures of girls with extremely tight abs are misleading and unrealistic for the average person.

i wish i would have known this before, but i hope it helps you.

Hey honey. You poor thing, you must be having a terrible time.

I think you need a flesh and blood support group, not text and smilies.

But I'll give you one anyway [:

When you get less sedentary, I recommend you starting exercising with Gilad.

Do you have fittv? I record Gilad's total body sculpt. It's challenging, and upbeat and it feels like you're there with him. It's totally fun, and I know what you're going for.

You're not fat at all, not compared to a lot of other people, but when you're in high school and it seems that everyone else around you is skinny,  size zeros and twos, it's really hard to think you're normal.

I know what you're going through, so if you need some support, some encouragement, you can always PM me.

I'm betting you're a freshman, and I am too, so we can just vent to each other if we really need to about how stupid and irritating our teachers are. How bout it?

-Nikki

What everybody here seems to be ignoring is the fact that you are 14 and these things happen sometimes. Hormones, growing, feeling down - these things all contribute to weight gain sometimes.

As a 14 year old girl you should not be obsessing about calories at all, and I find it almost perverse that this site allows members who are so young, and, above all else, so thin. 120 pounds is the weight of a little girl. That's what you were and now, as corny as it sounds, you are becoming a woman. Growing womanly bits (boobs, hips) also adds weight, but I'm sorry my dear - you will never lose these ever again.

As somebody who was in your exact situation at your age (weight and height + weight gain), I know precisely how you feel. My advice to you would be to concentrate on being healthy, not thin, and to relax and have a good time before you start having to worry about other things, like bills and work and finding an apartment.

And for exactly the same reason, I would highly recommend going to a counsellor or therapist and having a talk. It always helped me out.

x