I know what you mean..

I am the opposite though. I have a fast metabolism so I'm underweight, and people are ALWAYS wondering what's on my plate. Since I am skinny, I am automatically banned from being able to eat salads for dinner. Also, my sorority has a chef that is always baking goodies for us. But on the occasion that I ACTUALLY don't want to eat dessert because I'm full, my sorority sisters will roll their eyes at me and say "stop being so anorexic"

Haha, little do they know that I actually eat way more than any of them.

Thanks for the reply mimi_js ! GAhh...I understand its frustrating getting mis-perceived, its like leave us alone!:D

Original Post by astiees:

...I know I must sound silly, but it really bothers me...

It is not silly at all. That sucks! I know what you mean. I used to eat pizza once in a while (about 4-6 slices) and people would look at me like I ate entire pizzas all the time. Crazy. People are just rude and judgemental.

I absolutely loathe it when people assume things about my eating habits.

For example, when I went to a restaurant with my skinny friend not long ago, she ordered a coke and I ordered a water. TWO FREAKIN TIMES the waitress brought refills, she'd give me the coke and her the water. I told her both times "Oh, I had the water."

I even told my friend in the middle of the meal.. "DUDE I seriously think this waitress is giving me the coke because I'm a fatty!"

And then, when the bills came.. SHE BILLED ME FOR THE COKE. I was in shock. We were both cracking up in disbelief. Since I'm fat, I must guzzle sugar and lard constantly! We didn't tip that waitress a penny and I am almost always a great tipper.

So yeah, it'll be interesting to see how I'll be treated once I'm skinny haha.

I think its funny, the whole soda thing. I never drink it...even before I started this I probably had 4 a year tops. Assumptions make me mad...no matter how hypocritical that is of me lol. ;D

i have to admit that i will do the "wow, this person won't be happy tomorrow after eating a whole mcD menu" when i see obese people in a fast food joint.... shame on me:-(

I guess what bothers me is that I happen to know not every obese person eats the whole MD menu...in fact if you look around at some of he thinner people in there you will find they are eating more than the overweight person ....but not so many people check out what they are eating. Out of the 4 times I am there a year at least 3 of those times I went were because my thin friends went to stuff their faces. I am not trying to imply that this occurs for every overweight or obese person...but for all any of us know there is some obese guy in their who had just lost 30 pound and was rewarding himself with a big mac he hadn't had in months. Its not fun being the person getting stared at while trying to enjoy a meal. (This all doesn't imply to MD either :D) Anywho, all I am saying why should anyone look or for that matter stare....who's business is it?

Unless you're ordering enough food for four or five people and sitting there eating it all by yourself, nobody else is noticing anything out of the ordinary. A lot of slightly (or not so slightly) large people feel self-conscious about eating in public because they THINK 'everyone's looking at me' but the cold hard facts are that nobody really cares because everyone else is wrapped up in their own affairs and  they're not really noticing you at all. It's none of their business anyway...

I've found that the only people who think they should care about what YOU eat are the ones who are very insecure themselves and they're trying to make themselves feel better by pushing you down.

I used to fall prey to that assumption myself and think that 'I' must be eating like a pig... but I got over it, and when I finally started calorie-counting I found that I really wasn't that bad. A little extra each day really adds up over time.

It made me mad one time at a restaurant a pretty upscale one too the waitress came back to the table and of course i was with a bachlorette party so it was like a table of 15 and she did have a lot of things to remember but when i told her i needed a refill and i was drinking regular coke she said "diet" right?? I was like "no regular" yes i am big but dont assume im drinking diet, bitch!!! LOL  I could have got mad but i didnt. 


Clarice

Astiees - of course, you're absolutely right, and i mean it: shame on me for thinking that - kajikiit, i agree with you that i look because i worry that i'm being looked at... so i seriously apologize for having done that!

Hey! I dont' think the diet coke thing goes for being fat or skinny... people look at me, see that I'm a woman, and assume its diet coke... just to say...

yup. ever been asked if you were pregnant? i have been - twice. great stuff, that. and no, in no way shape or form is that a compliment. no way, no how.

the worst i saw is a 'larger' girl being verbally abused by a drunk 'cougar' type lady that drinking while pregnant was the worst sin of all sins (and she went on quite loudly) until the girl said something to the tune of 'look lady, you have no right to take stabs at strangers - i am not pregnant - please go away' and the older lady didn't even stop. ddin't even apologize. nice.

bah, on the other side of the coin i find it very hard to not give odd looks to the 90 pound woman that has been on the treadmill for 2 hours... hard to not think she has a disorder... it's hard to not wonder why the 400 pound couple (800 together) has a shopping cart with 20x2L bottles of pop and 7 bags of chips and 10 slabs of ground beef.

for the most part, i agree with kajikit - most people (who are not under or overweight to the extreme) are less than memorable and no one really notices.

p.s. i have got to mention (lest my head explode) that a calorie is a calorie, and if you are larger than you would like it is a fact that you either consume more than your ideal (found in others you refer to as thinner) or you do far less physical activity. to be a contributing member of this site and state that a thinner person eats way more than you (without the requisite disclaimer stating they are a soccer star or champion figure skater) seems illogical to me.

I'm at the gym all the time and I always feel like the employees and regulars  are looking at me thinking, "Boy she must really know how to eat because she's constantly here and she's still not skinny" They're probably not but I can't help but think it

Original Post by astiees:

I think its funny, the whole soda thing. I never drink it...even before I

i can understand completely.

my pet peeve is that everone seems to think that i eat sweets all the time, wheras i got fat by eating too much cheese, nuts and pasta, and do not like sweets at all.

one former colleague tried to give me "advice" (she lost some weight by a program she attended) by saying "just try to eat a bit less sweets" grrr

There's some truth to what you're saying - it takes a lot less than most people realize to create a sufficient surplus to cause significant weight gain.

Just 100 calories over per day and you're gaining 1 lb. per month - and it could all be in broccoli & meusli, not french fries (although you pass the point of surplus a lot faster/easier with the junk foods).

But the other side of the coin that a lot of obese people are in denial about - they DO or DID overeat. Without doing so a body cannot remain overweight. It takes a lot of calories to keep a 300 lb body at 300 lbs. It may not seem like a lot to the person concerned, but 3400 calories (to maintain 300 lbs on light activity) is quite a bit of food. It is also about an average calorie intake in the US, so people tend to think of 3400 as a reasonable amount, but it's not, unless you are an extremely active and  muscular athlete.

Living over here, where people more typically subsist on 1500-2000 calories (and that's when they are NOT on a diet) is what finally drilled it into me that what is considered a "Normal" calorie intake in the US is actually extremely high, so it's no wonder that 60% of Americans are overweight.

My mom has struggled with her weight somewhat, but like you, she doesn't "overindulge". We're a family who eats healthy most of the time, and calorie-wise, she doesn't consume all that many. So even though I'm not in the same position, I can understand what you mean.

what is considered a "Normal" calorie intake in the US is actually extremely high

Very true. I come from Russia, and people there don't consume nearly as much as in the US. And this is speaking of a country that loves fried fish, meatballs, fried potatoes, butter, pancakes, bread, and pastries.