Weight Gain

i are "trying" to gain weight by this i mean i am struggling with the idea of every day eating 2000 cals,  i posted about eating out and that has helped, but its hard cause stuff is so unhealthy at rest I end up being scared and still counting but like i tell my boyfriend at least i am trying which was a lot diffrent from last year,  working out obsesivly and crying when i had to go out to eat.  but anyway its just so interesting to me people who have never had eating disorder friends or not really encountered it.  i grew up all around it my whole life....but many of my friends greatest advice is that i need to see a nutritionalist so he can tell me what to eat...i am like...HELLO I KNOW WHAT IS IN EVERYTHING...thats the problem.  i really do have friends who just do not have experiences with this.  even girls who are healthy are like come on just eat some fries with mayo,  and i did it,  after 3 i was like what am i doing and where did these people come from.   anyone else deal with this

'Where did these people come from?'..... Most people aren't doctors or counsellors or trainined in psychotherapy.  The average man/woman in the street wouldn't know what to advise someone suffering from an eating disorder any better than they'd know what to advise someone suffering from Parkinson's disease, a dislocated knee or clinical depression.   Your girlfriends, being healthy normal girls, are going to say 'eat some fries and mayo' because that's what healthy, normal girls eat from time to time.   The fact that you think it's unhealthy and it freaks you out won't have occurred to them. 

So don't expect parents, friends or colleagues to 'say the right thing' or have all answers.  They don't live inside your head and they don't see the world the way you see it.  Normal people tend to assume others are normal..... and that's how they're treating you.  Appreciate their friendship and support at face-value and go to professionals for the specific help you really need to resolve the problem.

I agree. As sucky as it is, you kind of have to accept that friends and sometimes even family can't wrap their heads around the concept of an ED. Don't expect them to understand.

For instance, I'm in a band with 3 growing, very hungry boys. They know I was anorexic for a long time, but now that i'm in recovery I've started to binge-eat. They don't believe me when I say I've eaten a lot that day. Their responses are "oh, what did you have a bowl of fruit? a piece of lettuce?" When I had anorexia, they forced me to go out with them and have three full meals one day, thinking my life would be back to normal.

It's really refreshing to talk to somebody professional, who doesn't have a biased opinion about you.

Remember, EDs are confusing things. Sometimes YOU don't even understand it, so how could somebody else?

 

Sometimes I actually find it refreshing to be around friends who "eating disorder" means nothing to. I feel more pushed to eat normally around them, and it usually ends up being fun! It's easier to let yourself eat a healthy amount of food when other people are.

ahhh I knowww!!! I'm trying to gain weight as well and I'm finding it much more harder than losing. People are real supportive that I'm putting so much effort into trying but the just don't understand! I've actually been told (by people who know me so well already) that I should just go have a big mac or something everyday and i'll gain like THAT! yeah sureeeeee. They really think its the easiest thing in the world and literally think I'm nuts when I fail to gain. i can totally empathize with what you're talking about because when someone like you or me hears thats kind of stuff from other, you can't help but think, ARE YOU SERIOUS?! I just wanted to say I understand the difficulty too...